::a place called here::

For those who have been following my blog since ages,u might noticed that i always claimed happines in mmu doesnt stay long.i'm not blaming the place nor the people.sometimes it was just me.

2years in malacca made me realised that theres not even one person around me who never been in the social crisis.i've been observing all this while and i came out with the teori that happiness here is never going to be forever.take note that this doesnt apply to everyone here.i'm writing base on people around me.

lets just put it this way.people kept on changing friends.this semester u're with this one of click,the next semester u'll be with the other.this happened during the foundation year.and while entering degree,the 'changing frens' thingy will slow down and u'll find a group of people whom u think best fits u.correct me if i'm wrong yah mmuians.this is just one of my tak cool teories.

as for me,i've been bitched around for a long period of time.one girl made this statement.'she has ruined my life'. i.have.ruined.someone's.life.how cool would that be? and a guy wrote this somewhere and i accidently read it.'alia,anda hipokrit'. cool kan? theres more things happened and it will take forever for me to list it down.i'm tired of being all weepy and sad while people doesnt stop condeming.

theres this group of people whom i once called frens who actually cant stop condeming.she said i've ruined her life because she claimed,i've taken all the attention of her friends and she felt so left out.i've commited theft for stealing friends from her.she always questioned things like,why on earth did all her friends 'forgive me too easily' when i did anything wrong.or in another word,why didnt they just ditch me.

this one guy,claimed that he knows me better than anyone.i dont know if u're reading but i..i dont know.we have done so many things together. i appreciate those times when u cried while i was crying.i appreciate every single second u made me laugh.but u know,things happened.u know me well to judge me kan and i have nothing to say anymore.i cant even look at your face in the class because it scares me.i'm scared that we'll be frens again and kt akan gado lagi.

so in this time being,i dont think i can manage to face it all over again.

i've done several bad things in the past.mcm rosakkan hp,rosakkan jam,rosakkan everything i ever touched.i said things that hurt people.like subang is the best.i love my family and i hate this place.i'm loud.i dont have friends and i dont even bother to make one.i dressed up my own way and i dont like what normal people like.i speak up honestly and i doesnt hide what i feel.things like this make me the worst person in the world that should be killed.and they did.hurrah.

i've been on my bended knee once when they bitched around about me to everyone and i would never let it happened again.fatin,i'm sorry i dragged u into my own made crisis.i never ask anyone to be on my side because i know who i am and where i stand.i strongly belive that no one have the right to condemn me more than people in subang.they knew me inside and out since forever and yet,they havent complain.i screwed things several times but this bunch of people doesnt condemn.they adviced.

now it make sense why i have lost trust in people kan?

so,adik2.friends crisis in mmu is so a normal thing.i guess it happens everywhere.some people became friends for fame and money.some just too desperate to be in a click.some dont even know why they became friends and some doesnt even care to make one friend.all in all,i believe there is some of them who actually cares and stay with us.people we can call friends.if things happened,take time and try to settle it.langit tak selalunya cerah and we cant expect everyone to be perfect.